“The Untreated traumas of childhood, become the frustrating dramas of adulthood”
Within the subconscious mind lives the spirit of your Inner Child. Your inner child has been absorbing information like a sponge from the people and circumstances of your environment, long before you were able to process what was going on, mentally and emotionally. Becoming more aware of your inner child through therapy can help unearth the pain and ultimately offer healing. Acknowledging the inner child involves recognizing and accepting the things that caused pain in childhood, bringing them to light to understand how they are impacting you now.
The concept of the inner child, first popularized by Psychotherapist Carl Jung and further explored by Psychologists like John Bradshaw, is a powerful lens through which we can better understand and address our emotional wounds and traumas. Your inner child represents the youthful, vulnerable part of you that has experienced pain, neglect or unmet needs in the past. Healing your inner child is a transformative process, a powerful journey of self-discovery and self-compassion that can lead to increased self-awareness, emotional well-being and healthier relationships.
To heal your inner child, it’s essential to first understand what it is and how it came to be wounded. The inner child consists of the emotions, memories, and beliefs we formed during childhood, especially during our formative years (birth to around age seven). These experiences shape our self-esteem, self-worth, and overall emotional health.
Begin your journey by reflecting on your childhood experiences. Self-reflection allows you to take time to recall both positive and negative memories. Consider how they have influenced your adult life, relationships, and self-perception. This introspection will help you identify wounds and patterns that need healing. Recognize that all feelings, even those from childhood, are valid. Allow yourself to feel and express any repressed emotions, whether they be anger, sadness, fear, or joy. Avoid suppressing or dismissing these feelings, as they are essential to the healing process.
“So much of the healing of our world begins in healing the inner child who rarely came out to play”
Practice self-compassion by treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer a child. Understand that you deserved love and care as a child, and you still deserve it now. Self-compassion can help you reframe negative self-talk and build self-esteem. Once you have gained insight into your inner child, you can employ various techniques to nurture and heal this wounded aspect of yourself.
Keep a journal where you can write letters to your inner child. Offer reassurance, comfort, and encouragement to this vulnerable part of yourself. This practice allows you to form a deeper connection with your inner child and provides an outlet for healing. Engage in guided meditations and visualizations designed to connect with and heal your inner child. Imagine yourself comforting and nurturing your younger self. These practices can be profoundly healing and therapeutic.
Healing your inner child often involves breaking unhealthy patterns and behaviours that stem from childhood wounds. Recognize how these patterns manifest in your life and actively work to change them. There is a need to be aware of what triggers emotional reactions or unhealthy behaviours. These triggers often point to unhealed wounds from the past.
Establish and maintain healthy boundaries in your relationships. This ensures that you protect your emotional well-being and prevent further harm to your inner child. Prioritize self-care to nurture your emotional and psychological well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy, relaxation, and a sense of security.
Forgiveness is a powerful tool in inner child healing. This doesn’t necessarily mean forgiving those who may have caused your childhood wounds, it’s about forgiving yourself for any perceived mistakes or self-blame you may be carrying. Forgiving yourself allows you to let go of guilt and shame and move towards self-acceptance and self-love. As an adult, you can become the parent your inner child never had. Practice self-nurturing and self-soothing techniques when you’re feeling vulnerable or triggered. Consistently show yourself love, care, and compassion. This ongoing reparenting process can gradually reprogram negative beliefs and self-critical inner dialogue.
Carl Jung introduced the concept of the ‘shadow,’ which represents the aspects of ourselves we deny or repress. These often originate in childhood experiences where we were told certain behaviours or emotions were unacceptable. Shadow work involves acknowledging and integrating these suppressed aspects, allowing for greater self-wholeness and healing. It is important to maintain consistency because healing your inner child is an ongoing process. It requires consistent effort and self-awareness. Regularly check in with your inner child, practice self-compassion, and adjust your healing techniques as needed.
Remember that setbacks are a normal part of the journey as they offer opportunities for further growth and healing your inner child is a profound journey that involves exploring and addressing deep-seated wounds from childhood. It’s about creating a nurturing and loving relationship with the vulnerable aspects of yourself. While it can be challenging at times, the rewards of inner child healing are immeasurable in terms of personal growth and well-being.
“The wound is not my fault, but the healing is my responsibility”